Metzler

The flat rocks provide a perfect place to sit and watch the water. There are small waterfalls on both sides of me. Today the water of the river flows like crystal clear melted diamonds. The sunlight dances on the water as it moves through the rocks and cascades over the falls.

The river is deceptively calm and peaceful. Hard to believe this gentle flow has created the great flat rocks on which I sit. Yet, it did. It shaped these great stones.

Today as I sit writing on the stony shore of Plum Creek there is no hint of the raw power that these waters sometimes hold. The power roars through this place during summer and winter storms. Today the waters gently caress the rocks. Even the falls spill gently over the stone ledge. The same waters in the midst of a storm can lift these giant stones and set them down in a new place.

It seems to me the perfect metaphor for the pain that the transitions of divorce cause in our lives. We are shaped by these changes. Who you are today and who I am is a reflection of the great river of change that has swirled around us.

How are the waters shaping you today? Are they moving gently so that the changes they create are hardly noticeable? Are they raging? Have they picked you up perhaps against your will to move you to a different and unknown place?

Whatever transition is occurring in your life, it is shaping you for the future. You cannot avoid it. The question is not whether or not you want to be changed. The question is, What are you going to do about it?

When you acknowledge the formative process that continually refines and defines us, you can begin to enjoy the process. Gentle transitions are easy to accept but often hard to notice. The tumultuous changes that rip you out of one place and set you down in a strange new place are easily noticed. How can we not notice them! We can fight them and look back with yearning to the place where we once were. We can look back. We cannot go back.

We serve ourselves well when we turn our eyes to the new place and are willing to discover the wonder there. Life will form you. There is no doubt about it. The choice before us is: 1. Fight against the waters of transition and be constantly angry and frustrated because we cannot change the process. 2. Exult in the changes knowing they will take you to a new place of possibility you might never have imagined.

My stone seat today seems solid and unmovable. Yet next spring I may find it broken, moved or covered with new stones. I never know exactly what is coming. What a marvelous and exciting process1

Are the waters in your life forming you gently right now? Or are they raging? I would love to hear your story.

Melissa McCutcheon is a personal life coach and a licensed clinical counselor. She specializes in coaching people in life transitions to rediscover their passions and strengths to create new and joy filled lives. Helping people who are struggling with the emotional earthquakes of divorce find a new life of fulfillment and peace is a special joy to her. If your divorce was caused by a spouse coming 'out of the closet,' you will find in Melissa someone who understands your unique pain. Read more of her articles and find contact information by going to http://www.makechangegreat.com